An out-of-towner accidentally drives his car into a deep ditch on the side of a country road. Luckily a farmer happened by with his big old horse named Benny.
The man asked for help. The farmer said Benny could pull his car out. So he backed Benny up and hitched Benny to the man's car bumper.
Then he yelled, "Pull, Nellie, pull." Benny didn't move.
Then he yelled, "Come on, pull Ranger." Still, Benny didn't move.
Then he yelled really loud, "Now pull, Fred, pull hard." Benny just stood.
Then the farmer nonchalantly said, "Okay, Benny, pull."
Benny pulled the car out of the ditch.
The man was very appreciative but curious. He asked the farmer why he called his horse by the wrong name three times.
The farmer said, "Oh, Benny is blind, and if he thought he was the only one pulling he wouldn't even try."
Your friendship means so much to me that... When you cry, I cry. When you laugh, I laugh. When you jump out a window, I laugh some more.
Our school had just installed a new air-conditioning system, and a representative from the company wanted to make sure it was running smoothly. Poking his head into an empty classroom, he asked the teacher, "Any little problems here?" "No," she said, smiling. "All our little problems have gone home."
Two Sardarjis were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying like anything. So the
other asked,”Why are you crying?”
The first one replied, “I came here for blood test.”
Second one asked, “So, are you afraid?”
First one replied, “No, not that during the blood test they cut my finger.”
Hearing this the second one started crying. The first one was astonished and asked other,
“Why are you crying?”
The other replied, “I have come for my urine test.”
There is nothing more expensive than a single drop of a female/girl tear!
When a tear falls, it first mixes with 'MAC' eyeliner and 'Maybelline' mascara;
Then it comes down to the cheek, it mixes with "La Femme" blusher;
And in case it touches the lips, it gets mixed with 'Lancome' lipstick;
This means that a single drop is worth at least Rs 15000!
Sally walked in to the Dentist office to make an appointment. “How much do you charge to pull out a tooth?” She asked.” “It’s $130″, was the prompt reply. “$130!” gasped Sally, that’s ridiculous! There must be a way for you to go cheaper.” “Well,” said the Dentist thoughtfully, I suppose if we don’t numb it, we could knock off $30.” “Only $30?,” countered Sally, “that’s still $100, you’ve got to make it cheaper.” “Well,” said the Dentist after a long pause, “I suppose if we take it out with a wrench we could knock it down to $50.” “Perfect”, said Sally happily. “I would like to make an appointment for next Tuesday, for my husband Jack.”
An elderly husband and wife visit their doctor when they begin forgetting little things. Their doctor tells them that many people find it useful to write themselves little notes.
When they get home, the wife says, "Dear, will you please go to the kitchen and get me a dish of ice cream? And maybe write that down so you won't forget?"
"Nonsense," says the husband, "I can remember a dish of ice cream."
"Well," says the wife, "I'd also like some strawberries and whipped cream on it."
"My memory's not all that bad," says the husband. "No problem -- a dish of ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream. I don't need to write it down."
He goes into the kitchen; his wife hears pots and pans banging around. The husband finally emerges from the kitchen and presents his wife with a plate of bacon and eggs.
She looks at the plate and asks, "Hey, where's the toast I asked for?"