The housemaid, tidying the stairs the morning after a reception, found lying there one of the solid silver teaspoons. "My goodness gracious!" she exclaimed, as she retrieved the piece of silver. "Someone of the company had a hole in his pocket."
Four expectant fathers pace in a hospital waiting room while their wives are in labor. The nurse enters and tells the first man, "Congratulations, you're the father of twins."
"What a coincidence," the man says. "I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team."
A little later, the nurse returns and tells the second man, "You are the father of triplets."
"That's really an incredible coincidence," he answers. "I work for the 3M Corporation."
An hour later, the nurse tells the third man that his wife has just given birth to quadruplets.
The man says, "I don't believe it! I work for the Four Seasons. What a coincidence!"
After hearing this, everyone's attention turns to the fourth guy, who has just fainted. He slowly regains consciousness and whispers, "I should have never taken that job at Millennium Computers."
A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman,
"Which book has helped you most in your life?"
The woman replied - "My husband's cheque book."
As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.
An EGYPTIAN girl asked an INDIAN boy:
What can u do for me?
The boy replied:
come behind the PYRAMID.
I will make u MUMMY.An EGYPTIAN girl asked an INDIAN boy:
What can u do for me?
The boy replied:
come behind the PYRAMID.
I will make u MUMMY.
Rob and Tom apply for the same job. They take a written test. “You both got the same number of questions wrong,” the HR person tells them, “but Rob gets the job.”
“If we both got the same number of questions wrong, how come he gets the job?” Tom asks indignantly.
“Well,” says the HR person, “one of his incorrect answers was better than yours.”
“Whoa, how can that be?”
“For problem No. 46, Rob wrote, ‘I don’t know.’ You wrote, ‘Me neither.’”
A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.
His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”