A student is talking to his teacher.
Student: "Would you punish me for something I didn`t do?"
Teacher:" Of course not."
Student: "Good, because I haven't done my homework."
A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissed them to go to church, “and why is it necessary to be quiet in church?”
Little Johnny replied, “Because we must not disturb people while sleeping.”
The teacher noticed that Johnny had been daydreaming for a long time. She decided to get his attention. "Johnny," she said, "If the world is 25,000 miles around and eggs are sixty cents a dozen, how old am I?
"Thirty-four," Johnny answered unhesitatingly.
The teacher replied "Well, that's not far from my actual age. Tell me...how did you guess?"
Oh, there's nothing to it," Johnny said. "My big sister is seventeen and she's only half-crazy."
Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn't do something about it. So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed. Tom slept well, and in fact, beat the alarm in the morning. He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work.
"Boss", he said, "The pill actually worked!"
"That's all fine" said the boss, "But where were you yesterday?"
Jasmeet caught her husband Santa Singh searching high and low all around his living room. Jasmeet : “What are you searching for?” Santa : “Hidden camera!” Jasmeet : “And what makes you think that there are hidden camera here?” Santa : “That guy on tv knows exactly what I am doing. Why every few minutes he keeps saying, You are watching the Star World channel. How does he know that?”
If A Girl Laughs Loudly She Is Cheerful
If A Boy Laughs Loudly He Is Manner less
If A Girl Talks Sweetly She Is Charming
If A Boy Talks Sweetly He Is A Flirt
If A Girl Is Shopping She Is Trendy
If A Boy Is Shopping He Is Wasting Money
If A Girl Is Silent She Is Feeling Sad
If A Boy Is Silent He Is Being Rude
If Girls Walk In A Group Its A Group
If Boys Walk In A Group Its A GANG.. !
"Dear God, please take care of my daddy and my mommy and my sister and my brother and my doggy and me. Oh, please take care of yourself, God. If anything happens to you, we're gonna be in a big mess."